I’ve known Amy Grant for most of my life. As a little girl I remember being scared at night as I was trying to fall asleep, and I would just press repeat on her song “Angels.” I knew most of her songs by heart and still do to this day. You may or may not be familiar with her music, but I guarantee if you had a chance to sit down with Amy over coffee you would find that she is one of the most authentic and most loving persons you’ve ever met. She has a gift of connecting with people both musically and personally. We are honored to have her join Grace for Moms. Her most recent album released this year is called “How Mercy Looks from Here”. —Kristy
When Kristy asked me to write down helpful insights for mothers, all I could think of were the sleep-deprived years: 1987-1995. They are a blur to me, even now.
I had three young children and was at the height of a busy recording career, which was good news and bad news.
Success meant more work, at home and on the road.
Even though I had help, I still felt overwhelmed much of the time.
I remember a phone call that I made to my older sister Kathy, one day when Matt, Millie and Sarah were young. I was probably crying about all of the things I was not doing “right”. With care and kindness in her voice, she asked me, “Did your children sleep last night? Do they have on enough clothes to keep them warm today? Have they been fed?” I think I managed to whimper “yes”; to which she said, “Then everything’s OK. They’ve got a place to sleep, something in their tummy. They are dressed. Now, tell them you love them. You’re good and they are golden.”
No two lives are the same.
No two lives look the same.
Learning to shut down that crazy, pointless impulse to compare, compete and measure, {WHAT IS THAT THING ANYWAY?} is a great step toward energy conservation and will save you a lot of heartache.
One of the eye opening processes of being a mom, of being a wife, of being a woman is discovering and valuing what uniquely matters to you.
Because of your unique wiring, some things will matter to you that won’t matter to anybody else. Other things will matter to your friends that really have no bearing on your happiness at all.
For instance, I discovered that I did not care if my children were fashionably dressed, or for that matter, if I was either. I didn’t expect them to stay clean because kids are messy. I realized that I didn’t have the time or energy to be connected to the whole world via the internet. {I know, it’s ironic that I am doing this blog.}
Early on, I also discovered that piddling was very important to me, and I wanted my children to enjoy it too. What is piddling you ask? Piddling, or puttering, is what I refer to as “the passage of unconstructed time“. By the way, this does not happen in front of a TV or computer screen of any kind. Webster defines “puttering” as “moving or acting aimlessly, working at random”.
It turns out that piddling is essential to creativity.
There were times that I had to take deep breaths…when my friends’ children were in the T-ball playoffs, or on travel soccer teams, in summer theater productions, and my children were…piddling.
Then I would realize, oh yeah, they’ve got my genes. They need space to piddle. They need to be creative.
Piddling matters to them too.
Life gives us all ample opportunities to figure out how we fit in the big mosaic. We all will answer the questions:
- What are my strengths?
- What am I passionate about?
- What do I enjoy doing?
We tend to worry and stress out trying to help our children discover their place. Trust me, life will give your children those opportunities as well.
One memory of the sleep-deprived years that has had the longest and deepest impact on my life happened one morning, as I was pouring a cup of coffee, weary from all-night overseas interviews. I admitted to my mother-in-law, Mary, that I was so overwhelmed with life and that I was hardly opening my Bible. Most days my prayers were hurried, if they existed at all.
She looked at me and said, “Amy, I pray a simple prayer every morning. I think if you can pray this prayer, it will be enough:”
This was the prayer she prayed:
Lord, lead me today to those I need, and to those that need me.
And let something I do have eternal significance.
That prayer has made all the difference.
Register to win one of 10 autographed CD’s of Amy’s new album, How Mercy Looks from Here, by signing up for our beYOUtiful Grace Giveaway.
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